Thursday, June 08, 2006

Cole Trickle for Reals?

Yeah, more religious affiliation in NASCAR! Now the conservative protestant religious beliefs that course through America’s most attended sporting event will have a new “religious” kid on the block to bully around. The Church of Scientology will now be sponsoring a car in the lower ranks of the NASCAR circuit. Kenton Gray (sounds like a crack-pot) will be driving a car which will be sponsored by Bridge Publishing, the publishers of L. Ron Hubbard’s books. The car will have the word Dianetics painted on the hood, for all the drug addled and drunk rednecks to see. “Who the hell is Diane Tics?”

Now I am no fan of NASCAR and even less of a fan of Scientology, however this marriage seems to make some perverted sense. It has long been time to tempt the millions of Christians who live for NASCAR with something else that they can easily be hypocritical of. Look out Joe Gibbs, some day you may have to “face-off” against an insane John Travolta in pit row or even physically defend yourself and your godliness against Tom Cruise whilst he soaks you with the froth that splatters from his maniacal shit eating grin.

It is a win-win scenario if the only the self-righteous Scientologists can just get their Ford Taurus, late model car upgraded through the ranks to take on the big boys.

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