Friday, October 27, 2006

Tiki Barber Makes Fun of the Mentally Deficient

via Mark Maske's NFL Insider blog

"I will call them idiots because they have neither spoken to me nor any one of my teammates or any of my coaches. Yet all they do is criticize me for being a distraction with this retirement thing. And that includes Gary Myers. That includes Tom Jackson on ESPN. That includes the ultimate character guy--facetiously speaking, of course--Michael Irvin. Please get a clue on how to be a journalist. "--Tiki Barber, on his satellite radio show

First of all, that's like the worst job of ripping on a guy I've ever seen. "Facetiously speaking, of course"--what the hell , Tiki? That's all you got, man? That's like the Laguna Beach episode of "Yo' Mama" quality rippage man. Tighten it up!

Secondly, Michael Irvin is a journalist? Does that mean that at some point in the not-too-distant future he might get a chance to fill in at the ABC World News desk? Because I'd watch and record that telecast. "Iraq? IRAQ? It's crazy over there! Crazy! Do you know who I am? I'm Michael Irvin, reporting! Stay tuned for 22 minutes of incoherent mumbling."

Lastly, ripping on Michael Irvin at this point feels like the Sports Talk equivalent of beating up an Alzheimer's patient. The guy is clearly not in control of his faculties. It's just mean at this point. Tiki would have a much more lively and more sensical debate if he picked a fight with a drunk baby kitten.


Critic said...

Tiki is whiter than Tom Brokaw

thejim said...

I'm going to go ahead and agree, Michael Irvin is basically the "Corky" of ESPN.

I wish Tiki would get in a verbal sparring match with Shaun Alexander. That's some serious mirror image, Doink the Clown from 1994 shit.

Badcock said...

I agree with all the general points, but it is a true fact that all the female sideline reporters reading cue cards over the action are the "Corky" of the sports broadcastinng world.

M. Irvin is the Urkell of ESPN.

Tiki should have written a haiku to rag on Irvin:

"Urkell, how's your fused
vertebrae? Nice outfit, you
retard ... autumn wind"

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