I Dislike Your Favorite Team

The U.S. team was handed a real blow when the groupings for the 2006 World Cup were announced, having to face both the Czechs and Italians in their group. It is difficult to say with any certainty that the U.S. can make it out of their group, but Italy is trying its hardest to provide the right amount of distraction and possible suspensions, to allow the U.S. to rise out of this tourney’s Group of Death. I say to my Italian brethren, keep up the corruption and game fixing, for it is the most honorable thing for you to do, to help the U.S., a nation in distress, escape for a few weeks the horrors that we face on a daily basis to follow our team through the most glorious sporting event the world has ever known…wait…no I am not talking about the Superbowl, no not the World Series either…forget it. The reality is, most Americans don’t give a shit, and that’s ok, I can think of 10 people easy that I am glad I don’t have to share soccer with; they are tiring enough to talk to about football and baseball. Anyway, Italy keep it up and with a little luck and no surprise loss to Ghana, the U.S. might just have a chance.

Italian Goalkeeper Buffon reassures his aged mother that if he is suspended for game fixing, that he will launch vendetta against all who crossed him, just for her.