Apologies to the game plan calling for a focus on sport-based stories from Miwacar's timeout, but the big brains at UCLA and UW-Eau Claire have finally proven something we all pretty much knew already. That's right, science has finally weighed in and now agrees that if she is wearing a short skirt she is asking for it.
Kudos to the brave researchers for tackling such an important question. I expect law scholars nationwide are already hard at work developing a new standard of consent to prepare for the inevitable use of the "asking for it" defense* (*now with scientific backing). Gazing into my crystal ball I anticipate the severity of the defense for sexual assults will now directly correlate to the number of inches a skirt is above the knee with something like ten inches serving as a perfect defense.