We had a new term; we had publicized the Immediate Danger that is the Panda. More importantly, we got to use our new term to make fun of people who fucked up.
But apparently, people have not learned. Through our network of tipsters (OK, two people emailed me the story, and one of them doesn't even know I write for a blog) that we have another Chinese person getting into an enclosure with a panda. Again, they were trying to "hug" the panda.
This fucker jumped a fence over 6 feet tall to get to "Yang Yang". Do Not Fuck With Yang Yang in Yang Yang's house! Yes, pandas are cute. Often hilariously so. But they are bears, and thus Godless Killing Machines. And they bite. Don't Hug the Panda.
I volunteered at the National Zoo in DC for many years (true story).
And one time, I hugged a National-Treasure yet strangely hermaphroditic panda (not quite true). But it almost had a baby!
Long live ... what?
And Pandas are not actually bears. They are more closely related to raccoons.
If you had clicked the link, you would see that the Colbert Nation has rejected that fact.
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