Friday, July 04, 2008

Entertainment Weekly is Wrong, Wrong, Wrong

I like Entertainment Weekly. Probably more than I really should. But their website is always a fun place to kill some work free time. I enjoy their little lists and the like. But they've made an egregrious error in their most recent issue, in which they attempt to point to the most important Entertainment stuff in the past 25 years (The New Classics)

I have little beefs throughout the various listings, which is as it should be. There's no way we can all agree on the 100 Best TV shows of the last 25 years, or Movies, or whatever.

And no, my main problem isn't even with Titanic as the third best movie of the past 25 years (which is fucking silly, too). I mean, name a movie that wins that many awards and isn't even nominated for Best Screenplay. It was a horribly written, dodgy mess! Clearly Die Hard deserves to be ahead of fucking Titanic.

But I digress.

I'm speaking of "Achtung Baby" being named the 3rd best album released in the last 25 years. They put "The Joshua Tree" at #63, behind such important albums as a Greatest Hits collection from Bob Marley (which is fucking cheating, EW!) and Kelly Clarkson's debut record. Listen, I've been alive for all of U2's career. Calling "Achtung Baby" the third best album of the past 25 years, overlooks the fact that it is, at best, the 3rd best album that U2 has put out in 25 years!

"Achtung Baby" better than "The Joshua Tree"? Laughable. Better than "War" (which EW didn't even place on the Top 100--I guess there wasn't room after putting Siamese Dream by the whiny ass Pumpkins on the list)

About "Achtung Baby", the EW tastemeisters opined, "The Irish superstar's seventh studio album made a substantial leap, recognizing the emergence of alt-rock and electronic music in a way that was both ingenious [sic] and organic."

U2 recognized the emergence of alt-rock? What the fuck does that mean? They fucking spear-headed it, with their earlier albums. To me, at least, "Achtung Baby" (aside from a few genuinely affecting songs, like "One") is Bono at his prima donna worst. Does anyone really ever need to hear "The Fly" again?

Meanwhile, "War" announced an edgy pop-punk, with The Edge's guitar making freaky noises, and Bono writing damn good protest lyrics, like New Year's Day, or Sunday Bloody Sunday. Or with "40", a simple, beautiful song that made it onto every mixtape made for a girlfriend between the years of 1983 and 1995.

And the Joshua Tree! The Joshua Tree! Languishing at #63. Take your 3rd best cut on "Achtung"--maybe that's Mysterious Ways, or The Fly, or Even Better than the Real Thing. I'll take anything from The Joshua Tree before those songs. And I'll take one of the most beautiful/disturbing love songs ever before anything else U2 has recorded. Also, Desire is better than any song off of Achtung, aside from maybe One. Dig that Bo Diddley Beat + Edge Guitar Noise!

Also--Really, EW? Madonna's Ray of Light hits the Top 100, but no room for the Pixies' "Doolittle"? Or the Pogues' "If I Should Fall From the Grace of God"? Ano Billy Bragg at all? Are you FUCKING HIGH?

In summary, you wack, EW!


Jess said...

Someone should probably be slapped and then fired for putting Achtung Baby ahead of The Joshua Tree.

But I'm not sure how much my opinion counts, as even though U2 has been my all-time favorite band for as long as I can remember, I am only now starting to not dislike "With or Without You."

I should probably be slapped, too, I suppose.

Muumuuman said...

Actung Baby #3? What's their third best sit-com? Full House?

Anonymous said...

Post your 100 greatest albums of all-time and be prepared for a deluge. If you haven't already learned, it's one person's opinion.

Oh, and if you're reading Entertainment Weekly for anything other than gossip, you hardly qualify for a music fan in my book. Idiot.

Muumuuman said...

I've learned that Mr. Anonymous is a dickhead.

Jess said...

Anonymous dickheads love the internet.

Big Blue Monkey said...

To be fair, we psuedonynmous dickheads love the internet, too.

However, we do read through the post before we pass judgement, something Mr. Asshole Anonymous clearly didn't bother to do.

Anonymous is clearly a dick, but what are you going to do? Hunt him down and pour sugar in his gas tank? Whatever you do, don't hunt down that Anonymous commenter and pour sugar in his gas tank. That would be wrong. Pee in it, instead.

kutty said...

The sugar in his tank comments you best very nice

Hrithik Roshan