Star Tribune Deep Thinker Patrick Reusse has been pondering this issue for quite some time, and he's now ready to let you know that he thinks that last year's AL MVP is pretty important to his team's success. Thanks, Pat! Way to not phone it in, buddy.
The Wolves made a quiet but possibly not-completely-wrongheaded move, trading Justin Reed and Mike James to Houston for Juwan Howard, who is somehow only 34 years old. Obviously, this is nothing to get too excited about (though Juwan sounds over the fucking moon about it) but even a Reasonably Good Day can be brought to a quick and scary stop. You'll have to forgive us long-suffering Wolves fans when we hear Kevin McHale utter the words: "We have more stuff we're planning on doing." Sweet. Does Will Avery have a brother or something?
It appears you have lost your chance to see the famous Dancing Bears of the Balkans. Mima, Misho, and Svetla were released from what sounds like a pretty awful fucking life, and will be joining a community for retired dancing bears. The spokesperson of the refuge said, "Our aim is to make their life more bearable in their remaining years," I'm not kidding. They said bearable. You know, I think you can make puns about bears without having to save them. Colbert would be pissed. Also, I'd like to note that even as the world gets smaller or flatter, or whatever its doing, Eastern Europe is still a pretty strange place.
Antonio Freeman is retiring. Presumably, there is a place where volunteers can make his life more Packerable.