Saturday, February 09, 2008

Jim Zorn?

Jim Zorn is the new head coach of the Washington Drunken Savages. There is no way to portray this as the original plan. The original plan, we've heard, was to get Jim Zorn as the offensive coordinator (already a pretty big promotion from Quarterbacks Coach, which what Zorn was doing in Seattle before getting hired away by the Skins).

The reason most people, looking for thoughtful logic in the odd way the Skins have approached this coaching search, was that the table was being set for Jim Fassel, by getting his preferred coordinators hired first.

Ladies and Gentlemen, this is why you don't hire your coordinators first. Presumably, someone over at the Skins braintrust stopped getting high and watching the Aqua Teen Hunger Force movie long enough to realize that they were seriously getting ready to hire Jim Fassel. An intervention occurred, and that mistake was averted. Oh, but what to do about all the embarrassing promises they had made whilst high and drunk?

They probably realized that no self-respecting coach was going to come in with absolutely no say on his coordinators. They had already fired just about everyone who had been with the organization that they could have promoted from within with any credibility. So they were left with a choice--fire or reassign the guys they had just hired as coordinators, and cop to being woefully disorganized, and start up the entire process all over again. Or they could make a show of confidence, and announce they had a great head coach hired all along. Guess which route made the most sense to Dan Snyder and Vinny Cerrato?

The Drunken Savages, just 2 months ago, were being guided by a practical Holy Trinity of coaching--Joe Gibbs, Al Saunders, and Gregg Williams. It will now be led by a Quarterbacks coach and a Defensive Line coach (Greg Blanche). Will it work? Maybe--who knows what Zorn is capable of doing. But if he is successful, it will be luck that made the Skins promote him twice in two weeks, not careful planning and thoughtful deliberation.

Expect a large number of editorials like this one.


Andrew Wice said...

I'm shocked by Big BM's insinuation that there is something wrong with the decision-making process of the Washington Redskins.

They should be applauded for their boldness in flying in the face of all possible expectation and logic. Who else but a true visionary would accidentally hire a head coach who had never been a head coach at any level, hadn't even been an NFL coordinator or assistant coach?

There's some hot Washington Redskins action in my new novel, To The Last Drop.

Andrew Wice said...

In Sunday's press conference, Zorn referred to the Redskins colors as "maroon and black."

Which is not quite burgundy and gold.

But better than Jim Fassel.

Miwacar said...

Lest we forget that Jim Zorn, aside from being a decent QB in the league for many years--benfitting greatly from Steve Largent, was also the QB's coach for the ferocious juggernaut that was the Golden Gophers football team several years ago.

I expect great things from 2008 WashREd.

Amaysing1 said...

lmao @ the sarcasm in these comments. Yeah, Washington has set themselves back with this asinine move.

You can go ahead and throw away the momentum from last year.

Miwacar said...

The following is the title to an article in today's STrib

"Meidt leaves St. Olaf to take Redskins job"

The Oles now have NFL reach! Look out league the WashRed offense is going to be as sweet as an Ole Roll!

I see that Jim Zorn has wasted no time in assembling a crack coaching staff.

Andrew Wice said...

Sweet mother of choad.

Meidt is quoted, "Never in my wildest dreams did I think this could happen."

I'm right there with you, pal.

Zorn is filling in staff with Seattle position coaches and random college coaches. He even wants to bring in the Seahawks RB coach to replace Super Bowl champion E. Byner.

There is a theory that Zorn's hire is a stopgap measure until Snyder can hire Bill Cowher next year. Hmm?

Big Blue Monkey said...

That makes the most sense out of everything I've heard.

But that's:
a) not saying very much
b) over-reliant on the Skins making progress next year with the team and with Cowher.

I'd say that theory is the work of someone trying impose rational thought on what was a totally irrational decision.

Like a someone who paints dogs playing poker. Dogs don't play poker, and Dan Snyder doesn't plan two years in advance.

Andrew Wice said...

Zorn may not have been "a totally irrational decision" after all.

What was irrational was Snyder wanting Fassel. While the world was poo-pooing that terrible idea and asking "Whither Williams?" Snyder fell back on his other options.

I don't think anyone wants to work for Snyder for a copious variety of reasons, which is why they promoted Zorn from O-coordinator (which was already a reach).

So, in the end, it all worked out.